Adoption is a choice that you need to think about carefully. Many people have misleading ideas about adoption. Some think, "How could you go through your life never knowing what happened to your child?" Adoption is very different today from even twenty years ago. For example, you may want the right to select your baby's parents, meet them and even keep in touch over the years. Such changes have made the adoption option much easier to consider.
There are many reasons to consider adoption. Maybe you know in your heart that you can't take care of your baby because of time, money, or help. Maybe you already have children and a baby would add too much stress on you and your present household! Possibly, you are questioning your ability to parent at this time, uncertain or afraid and just need to know more about this choice.
You need to know there are many loving couples who would love to have a baby of their own, but can't due to infertility. They are waiting for a person like you - a person that wants to give a baby life, and share that baby with them. They want to love you and your baby by providing a strong, stable, loving, and healthy environment where your child can flourish and grow.
You are doing the right thing by researching all of your options. If for some reason you cannot parent, adoption may be the right choice for you! Our center would be glad to provide you with a referral to several adoption agencies in our area.
Frequently Asked Questions About Adoption:
How can I be helped financially?
There is no cost to you for adoption. This center can provide you with a referral to several agencies that will help you free of charge. Our agency has access to funds that will help assist you once you have made the decision to place your child in an adoptive family. In addition, many agencies work with adoptive parents to assist in providing for all your pregnancy-related expenses.
Can I choose a family for my baby?
Yes! Most agencies have already screened and approved many different families you can choose from. There are also additional options, such as choosing a friend or someone who has been recommended to you. The adoption agencies will help you in this process.
How often will I get to see my baby after adoption?
You have several options. When planning your child's adoption, you can choose an open adoption plan that allows ongoing visits with your child, or you can choose semi-open adoption that keeps you informed about your child's progress through letters and pictures. Also, you may prefer not to have any contact with your child or the adoptive family. Confidential plans are also possible.
Tell me more about open adoption:
With an option adoption plan you are able to:
Meet potential adoptive families
- before making your selection.
- You and the adoptive family may exchange information (names and addresses) at the appropriate time.
- There may be ongoing contact that may include visits together, gathering as extended family members during special occasions, etc.
- There is direct correspondence between you and the family.
- You and the family contact each other directly by telephone.
What's a "semi-open" adoption plan:
In a semi-open plan you choose a family from written non-identifying material provided by the agency.
- An agency or third party mediates the contact between you and the adoptive family before and after the birth.
- You will know the adoptive family by their first names only.
- Adoptive parents may be present at the birth and may possibly meet you before the birth.
- All correspondence is sent through the agency or third party.
- Post-placement meetings are arranged and supervised by the mediator
- Adoptive parents often share the child's pictures and letters with you, but may also include gifts, videotapes, etc.
How soon after birth can my baby go to the parents I choose?
The timing of your child's placement depends on three factors:
- What you prefer to be the time of placement
- Legal aspects of adoption, which may vary from state to state
- The cooperation of the birthfather
Many women want their baby placed with the adoptive family directly from the hospital, but you may prefer to place your baby in temporary care while you consider adoption.
How much will my child know about me?
That depends on what type of adoption you choose - open, semi-open, or confidential. Your agency will encourage you to provide complete medical and social history to your child, no matter what type of adoption you choose (in some states this is required).
Does the birthfather have any rights?
Both you and the birthfather have rights. If you disagree about adoption or you no longer have a relationship with him, your agency will work with the birthfather and/or the courts to determine if his rights can be terminated.
Can my child find me if he/she wants to search someday?
Laws in your state determine when your child may have access to information in the adoption file.